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Logline: A neurotic Archangel appears to a
recalcitrant nun and warns her that she has until
Christmas to amend her worldly life.
Independent Critique (BlueCat: Gordy Hoffman):
The premise ─ a misfit nun who comes to the aid of a
needy family ─ is compelling and … The script is highly
imaginative ─ a floating nun, a Saint in the form of a
dog and perverted lingerie buyers ─ all of this makes
for a really original story and takes the audience
somewhere it hasn’t gone before. There is some good
humor in this script. Some of the best humor comes from
the Halcyon Catalog Center, such as this interaction
between Dan and his boss, Natalie, [Natalie] “Why, those
are black magazines? Why are you only selling black
magazines? You’re not talking black to those people, are
you? ” [Dan] “I dunno. Sometimes I say, Yo. Is that
black, Natalie? ”
Maybe the most charming aspect of this story though, is
its heart. One feels the family really cares for one
another, despite their failings and shortcomings.
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Synopsis: Title: SIMPLICITY (Won Ohio Independent
Film Festival’s (OIFF) best North Coast comedy
screenplay under the title: Halcyon Days)
Setting: Cleveland, Ohio. At the convent of Our
Lady of Angels the Mother Superior (MS) calls a meeting
to announce a raffle to fund the sister=s depleting
retirement program. Conspicuous by their absence are Sr.
Simplicity, a menopausal nun (who is, as usual—somewhere
else), and—Sr. Angelica, a young novice who is in
ecstasy, floating high above the motley crew of sisters.
Meanwhile, on an upper floor, Sr. Simplicity cartwheels
along, her pet hound lumbering after her. As she enters
her bedroom, the beast follows her where it materializes
into the beautiful but neurotic Archangel St. Raphael, (Tobit’s
companion of the Old Testament), whom she curtly
addresses as ARalph.@ Admonishing her, he tells her that
Himself (the Lord above) is giving her until Christmas
to straighten out her disobedient life for she is in
danger of losing her immortal soul.
True to form, Sr. Simplicity, having misinterpreted her
role in the convent’s raffle, sees the opportunity to
amend her life and shows up unannounced at the door of
the dysfunctional Murdoch family—introducing herself as
the “top prize.” (Heaven forbid). Dan Murdoch, the
father, has recently lost his prestigious IT job and has
demeaned himself, taking on a part-time job at the local
Catalog Center Halcyon Days (a hotbed of legitimate
customers, hot chicks, and on-line perverts).
As for the forlorn Dan, his family unity begins to
unravel from stress (his marriage; his children), as he
strives to deal with it all. One wintry night, on the
way home from work, his fortunes change when he is blown
off the road and uncovers a bag of stolen bank money,
lost the day before during a robbery. The dough was
stolen by an incompetent gang of international thieves
led by Mule and his nasty nothings, a Chinaman and two
delightful Arabs.
As the Murdoch’s strife increases, Sr. Simplicity
rejoices, for she has found the perfect vehicle earning
“purgy points” in her efforts to tame the wacky Murdochs.
Soon she embroils herself into the fabric of the family,
caring, guiding and redirecting the rest of the misfits,
Sherry and Jason, to a higher level of virtue. Even
Dan's wife, Rachel (whose closest friend is a package of
processed food) is charmed by Sister Simplicity’s earthy
personality.
When Mule and his gang threaten the family, Sr.
Simplicity (with assistance from Dan and her Archangel,
who protests his being drafted into this daffy series of
events “… and they think a gay bishop is progress.”)
comes up with a plan which ends the malfeasance of these
misfits.
Dan’s marriage is saved, the kids see their dad as a
hero, and Sr. Simplicity is rewarded when she is chosen
the new Mother Superior of Our Lady of Angels Convent. |
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